Visit thePerfectSearch.com Rescue Dating
For the Perfect Search
by Melinda Maximova

September 19, 2012

Cupid Academy is now enrolling for 2013

Cupid Academy
Cupid Academy

Cupid Academy is a comprehensive certification program using hands-on, classroom training, combined with real life matchmaking assignments to help students hone their skills and start their own matchmaking business. Graduates from the Academy earn a matchmaking certificate and receive ongoing support to enable a smooth, profitable, transition into the lucrative and exciting business of high-end matchmaking.

Classes are designed for busy professionals and span a seven week period beginning Tuesday, January 15th, 2013. Three hour classes are held weekly in Emeryville, California, and taught by Melinda Maximova, founder and CEO of Perfect Search. Maximova is an accomplished teacher, author, and successful entrepreneur, and has been called upon as a premier expert in her field on countless radio and TV talk shows.

Over the past ten years I have witnessed first hand the frustration people experience trying to navigate dating, romantic relationships, and sex. With a degree in sociology and human sexuality, I want to share with you a wealth of information sure to enlighten, surprise, and ultimately to help you live your dream of becoming a VIP matchmaker. Enjoy a career that allows you the freedom to work for yourself, while helping other people overcome the challenges of meeting their mate, developing relationships and finding intimate love”.

-Melinda Maximova
CEO Perfect Search

The Cupid Academy is the only school of its kind in the United States with hands-on, personalized classroom instruction using real life matchmaking assignments.

Matchmaking is a subtle business and Cupid Academy teaches the nuances of date coaching, conflict resolution and relationship navigation so that Cupids not only help their clients find true love, but help them keep it! The Cupid Academy understands that matchmaking is more than a business, it is an intuitive art that involves the heart and must be handled with care.

Cupid Academy curriculum includes:

  • Client Target Profile
  • Generating Leads
  • Client Selection Process
  • Client Interview / Profiling Process
  • Candidate Matching
  • Matchmaking criteria
  • Ancillary services

Date Coaching
Image Consulting
Personal Shopping
Interior Design Consultation
Practice Date

  • Sales
  • Branding
  • Advertising
  • Public Relations
  • Event planning
  • Market Analysis
  • Specialized Vertical Marketing
  • Channel Partnering
  • Go to Market Partners
  • Ecosystem Partners
  • Matchmaking hard-learned lessons

For enrollment information and possible fee waivers, contact Melinda Maximova

melinda@theperfectsearch.com


April 11, 2012

Wine Lovers’ Tuesday at the Cliff House

Every Tuesday bottled wines are half price all day with purchase of entrée at San Francisco’s Cliff House!

It is crab season, so order the Dungeness crab cocktail with the Ocean Beach sandwich and enjoy a 100.00 bottle of wine for only 50 bucks on Tuesdays.

The Cliff House has been around in different forms since 1863 and the views of the ocean are spectacular. You have a choice of casual dining in the Bistro Restaurant on the main level, or the elegant Sutro’s at the Cliff House on the lower level. For excellent service, check if Christopher Thomas Malone is working and if so, ask to sit in his section.

Cliff House

Cliff House

Sutro Bath Ruins

Sutro Bath Ruins

Before dining, hike the amazing Lands End trails and explore the famous Sutro Bath ruins. You can meander past the Legion of Honor, and along cliffs with beautiful views of the Marin Headlands and Golden Gate Bridge. Or you can stroll along Ocean Beach and wander up the stairs to visit the historic Sutro Heights Park where Adolph Sutro once lived.

After dinner visit the Cliff House gift shop and buy some heavenly smelling lavender lotion, and then visit the Camera Obscura for 360 degrees of live images of the famous Seal Rocks and Ocean Beach.

Cliff House

1090 Point Lobos,

San Francisco, CA 94121

415-666-4005.

Food: Excellent

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Excellent

For more information, contact Melinda Maximova, matchmaker with Perfect Search

melinda@theperfectsearch.com


March 28, 2012

Romantic Walk in Telegraph Hill

Romantic Walk in Telegraph Hill

Date Planner

Date Planner

Wear comfortable shoes and explore the wooden stairways in Telegraph Hill to see some of the worlds most breathtaking city views. Ascend the Greenwich steps from the Embarcadero side of the slope and zigzag past the flower-laden gardens and quaint houses to meander over the hills, ending up in North Beach for dinner and drinks.

The topography of San Francisco is such that Coit Tower is visible from just about anywhere East of Russian and Nob Hills, and is one of the City’s most distinguishable skyline monuments. Many have suspected that Coit Tower was designed to resemble a fire-hose nozzle, but architect Henry T. Howard always maintained this was not his intention. Among the many beautiful sights from Coit Tower, none is so enchanting as the wild parrots of Telegraph Hill. The parrots are Cherry-Head Conures, whose flocks began as released or escaped birds, but now are established and thriving inhabitants of the area. Mark Bittner, wrote about the birds in his book, Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill, and was the subject of the documentary film of the same name. The sounds the birds make is very distinct, and if you catch them socializing in the trees around Coit Tower, the noise can be almost deafening.

Greenwich Stairs, Telegraph Hill

Greenwich Stairs, Telegraph Hill

Coit Tower

Coit Tower

Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill

Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill

 

From Coit Tower, continue West down Greenwich Street to North Beach’s Caffe Sport for Italian food served family style. The walls and ceiling at Caffe Sport are adorned with art made by the recently deceased former owner, Antonio La Tona, and every square inch of the place is filled with them. When you walk in the door your eyes are as stimulated as your appetite with all the colors, textures and smells. The food portions are large, intended to be shared family style, and the raviolis are to die for. Ask Gustavo to be your waiter and watch him beam with pride as he explains the menu items and art, on the walls.

Caffe Sport

Caffe Sport

Caffe Sport

Caffe Sport

Caffe Sport
Caffe Sport

 

 

 

Caffe Sport

574 Green St

(415) 981-1251

Food: Good

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Excellent

For more information, contact Melinda Maximova, matchmaker with Perfect Search

melinda@theperfectsearch.com


March 21, 2012

Date Planner: Weekend in South Lake Tahoe

Weekend in South Lake Tahoe

There is no place more beautiful than Lake Tahoe, and lucky for those of us in the Bay Area, it is only a three and a half hour drive — that is with no stops. However, if you want to make it a romantic getaway weekend, then you should stop frequently along the way and I have just the itinerary.

The first stop is for lunch at the Tower Cafe in Sacramento. This piece of Sacramento history sits near the historic Tower Theater on Broadway st. To get there, take Interstate 80 East to the15th St exit. the menu has items from across the globe, ranging from Piag’s Thai steak to Jamaican jerk chicken. They offer a huge selection of international beer and wine by the glass, as well as sangria and cocktails. The best part of the International restaurant is the amazing decor. Collecting items from across the globe the owner, Jim Seyman, has amassed a unique collection of art and hung it on every square inch of the place. They also have a massive, outdoor patio garden with fountains, tile, and wrought iron. This is especially nice on warm afternoons when you can sit outside and top off your meal with one of the masterpiece deserts created by pastry chef, Louise Mastrietti. These deserts appeal to the eye as well as the palette.

Tower Cafe Interior

Tower Cafe Interior

Garden at Tower Cafe

Garden at Tower Cafe

Tower Cafe Interior

Tower Cafe Interior

Next stop, continue through the foothills East along 80 to the little town of Placerville. This town was formally known as Hangtown because of the numerous hangings that occurred during the gold rush. It was an old western central hub for the Coloma region’s mining operations. The Hang Tree landmark is still prominately displayed on Main Street. Park your car and stroll along Main Street, window shopping the antique stores. Be sure and peek your head into the old hardware store that still sits atop hundred year old floor boards.

Cascada in Placerville, Ca

Cascada in Placerville, Ca

Placerville, Ca

Placerville, Ca

Placerville, Ca

Placerville, Ca

Grab a margarita and chips at Cascada Cantina and savor the salsa and guacamole. We love this place because of the home-made, lightly salted, tortilla chips they serve with three types of dips: Cilantro, roasted pepper, and a bean dip. If you order the guacamole to go with it, you’ll almost have a meal. Simply delicious. Sit by the window and watch the people walk by the sidewalk in this bustling tourist town.

After enjoying the walk through time in Placerville, get back in the car and begin your ascent up the gorgeous Sierra mountains to South Lake Tahoe. I love South Lake Tahoe because you have the skiing, beaches, mountain trails and spectacular views of nature, but you also have the fun night life at the casinos. Stay in one of the four casinos at Stateline, or get one of the cheaper motels along the road into town. We stay at Harrahs because we love the excitement, live concerts, fine dining and dancing on the weekends. The weekend we were there, we got to see Drive By Truckers in the South Shore Room at Harrahs and loved the intimate venue.

Drive By Truckers

Drive By Truckers

Drive By Truckers

Drive By Truckers

Although the casinos host several high-end restaurants, I always patronize a little local Sushi Restaurant down the street called, Sushi Pier. This place is always packed and happenin’ with locals, pro-skiiers, and crazy, hat-wearin’ kids, but the reason I love it, is because of the inexpensive, top-quality, all-you-can-eat, sushi. Bay Area foodies can be snobs, but I guarantee this place won’t disappoint even the most sophisticated sushi snob.

Sushi Piersushi pier

The next morning you have a choice of skiing, hiking, snow shoeing, sledding, tubing, sleigh riding, gambling or snow mobiling. South lake Tahoe has so much to offer. We took our snow shoes out in the morning and hiked along the numerous forest trails, and rode the gondola up to the Tamarack Lodge in the afternoon for lunch at the top of Heavenly Valley Ski Resort.

Gondola at Heavenly Valley Ski Resort

Gondola at Heavenly Valley Ski Resort

Lake Tahoe Forest

Lake Tahoe Forest

Lake Tahoe Forest

Fridays Station Steak & Seafood Grill


That evening we enjoyed the spectacular sunset view atop Fridays Station at Harrahs for cocktail hour before dinner. Fridays Station Steak & Seafood Grill is named after the Pony Express station located in Tahoe during the gold rush. The restaurant is located on the top floor of Harrah’s hotel tower, and has a 1,000-bottle display wine cellar and magnificent views from every table.

Tower Cafe

1518 Broadway Sacramento, CA 95818
(916) 441-0222

Food: Excellent

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Excellent

Cascada Cantina
384 Main St.
Placerville, CA 95667
(530) 344 – 7757

Food: Excellent

Atmosphere: Good

Service: Excellent

Sushi Pier

177 Lake Tahoe Blvd
Stateline, NV 89449

(775) 588-8588

Food: Excellent

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Good

Fridays Station Steak & Seafood Grill

15 Lake Tahoe

Stateline, Nevada 89449
(775) 588-6611

Food: Excellent

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Excellent

For more information, contact Melinda Maximova, matchmaker with Perfect Search

melinda@theperfectsearch.com


March 4, 2012

Dog Walking in Daly City

Saturday afternoon, dog walking and happy hour

Date Planner: Basketball on Union Street

If you like dogs, you have got to check out Fort Funston, just north of Daly City on Hwy 1. Fort Funston is a beautiful piece of coastal property with an off leash dog park, sand dunes, beach, and, old World War II fort ruins. Take a hike along the bluff trails overlooking the Pacific ocean, where hand-gliders take off and where dogs of all shapes and sizes roam leash-free. This is an old military site situated atop the sandy cliffs with a trail leading down to the ocean.

Fort FunstonFort Funston
Fort Funston
Fort Funston

There is ample free parking, and from the lookout you can watch the hang gliders doing amazing tricks. Bring along your furry friend and wander through the wind blown Cypress trees as you make your way down to the beach. Head South on the beach past the cement drainage structure and you’ll find a path leading back up to the hand glider platform. The stairs leading up are long and it is a pretty good work out, but the view is breathtaking and you are reminded how lucky you are to live near the powerful and spectacular Pacific Ocean.

Fort FunstonFort Funston

Fort Funston

After your hike, jump in the car and head back South on Highway 1 and take the Junipero Serra Blvd exit to the Boulevard Cafe for happy hour. The Boulevard Cafe is a fabulous, remodeled American restaurant in a “Googie” Building. Googies were architecturally distinct cafes in Southern California in the 50s built with a futuristic design influenced by car culture and outer space. One was used in the dance contest scene with Vincent Vega and Mia Wallace in the movie, Pulp Fiction. Boulevard Cafe resides in one of these gems, and always has a bustling crowd rotating through it’s doors. I prefer to eat in the cocktail lounge in the back because it is less crowded and the lounge has a very comfortable, modern, feel to it with it’s round port windows and beautiful mosaic tiled bar. Happy hour is Monday through Saturday from 11 am til 7 pm, with 5 dollar appetizers and 4 dollar drinks. The menu is six pages long with breakfast, burgers, pasta and cocktails, and six different kinds of macaroni and cheese. I like the Greek salad and Alexander Valley Vineyards Cabernet, but we’ve tried many other things on the menu and have been happy with them all. The service in the cocktail lounge is always very fast and efficient, and the crowd is non-pretentious, multi-cultural, and friendly. Who would have thunk that Daly City would be the place to spend a Saturday afternoon for a perfect romantic date with you, your sweetie, and your dogs?

Boulevard CafeBoulevard Cafe

Boulevard Cafe

Boulevard Cafe
Boulevard Cafe

Boulevard Cafe

2 Poncetta Drive
Daly City, CA 94015
650.755.3400

Food: Good

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Excellent

For more information, contact Melinda Maximova, matchmaker with Perfect Search

melinda@theperfectsearch.com


February 29, 2012

Date Planner: Basketball on Union Street

Saturday afternoon, lunch and the game
Date Planner: Basketball on Union Street

It is Saturday after noon and you want to enjoy your day off and explore the City. Your guy however, wants to watch the basketball game. You could just go your separate ways and meet up in the evening, but you really want to spend the day together. I have the perfect solution: Spend the afternoon on Union St and catch the game on one of the numerous screens at the Brick Yard Restaurant and Bar.

San Francisco’s Union St. in the Marina District is a happenin’ place any day of the week, but the weekends are especially fun. Park near Fillmore and walk along Union Street window shopping and people gazing. If your man is a real gem, he’ll patiently let you try on a few dresses in any of the numerous boutiques along the way and maybe even splurge on a purchase. For lunch, hit Nettie’s Crab Shack and enjoy the fish tacos or warm Dungeness crab roll with a couple Louisiana Lemonades. You can sit outside on the open air patio, or get a seat in the atrium under the massive skylight. Nettie’s is light and airy and you almost feel like you are on a big boat. The bartender is busy, but friendly and handsome, and he lets you know he’ll be right with you.

Nettie’s Crab Shack

2032 Union Street
San Francisco, CA 94123,
(415) 409-0300

Food: Good

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Good

After lunch head to The Brick Yard Restaurant and Bar for a basketball game. I love this place. Although it is a sports bar it doesn’t feel like one. In fact, we saw a young father and his buddies watching the game with his baby. Bamboo shades screen the skylights on the ceiling for good television viewing, but still allow enough light through to create a nice atmosphere. The back of the bar has an amazing Golden Gate Bridge replica that doubles as a cocktail bar ledge. Order the sweet potato fries with a beer and sit at one of the tables with stuffed, comfy chairs. This is the kind of place you could hang all day without feeling like you are sitting in a bar. After the game pass by the Bus Stop Saloon on your way back to the car to shoot a game of pool at 1901 Union Street. Exhausted and satisfied, you and your sweetie can head home both having enjoyed the day sharing each other’s passions.

Brick Yard Restaurant and Bar

1787 Union Street
San Francisco, CA 94123,
(415) 400-4712

Food: Good

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Good

For more information, contact Melinda Maximova, matchmaker with Perfect Search

melinda@theperfectsearch.com


Date Planner: North Beach

Date Planner: Elmwood District

After-work wine, music and dinner

Price: Moderate

Every city has one of those neighborhoods, perfect for an after-work, blanket-on-the-ground, with a bottle of wine date. Washington Square Park in San Francisco’s North Beach is just one of those spots. Washington Square Park sits across from St. Peter and Paul Church where Marilyn Monroe and Joe DiMaggio were photographed after getting married in 1954. One of the most romantic spots in San Francisco, this park has views of Coit Tower, lovers on blankets, Frisbee-tossers, and frolicking dogs. One of my favorite things to do on a Thursday after work is to meet my husband in the park, get a bottle of wine from Molinari’s Deli on Columbus St, share it on a blanket in the park, then wander down to catch the second half of a free, 4 pm show at The Saloon.

The Saloon sits at 1232 Grant Street and has been around since 1861. They have live blues bands seven days of the week and free 4 pm shows Thursday through Sunday. Last Thursday my husband and I were blown away by the talented Primitive Rhythm, whose genius defied the logic of not charging a cover. The floorboards have supported dancing feet since the mid 1800s and the smell of the tavern confirms it. Catch the show around 6:30 pm and they will still have the doors open. With guitar licks streaming and questionable women gyrating, you can enjoy some of San Francisco’s greatest blues bands for no more than a tip jar donation and a bottle of beer.

At 8 pm the second band starts to set up and this is a good time to catch dinner at one of North Beach’s numerous Italian restaurants. We love Bocce Cafe at 478 Green St. Unlike a lot of places in North Beach, Bocce Cafe is spacious and romantic with a huge garden setting. They have an out-door seating area in the back, and plenty of long tables in the front. On weekends they usually have a small jazz trio playing in the corner, but week nights are quiet enough for an intimate dinner for two. I loved the cappelini pomodoro with it’s simple fresh tomatoes, basil and olive oil. It is served in a bowl with just enough garlic for taste, without going overboard like some Italian places. My husband ordered the penne portobello pasta dish with chicken and prosciutto in marsala sauce. The pasta sauce was defined with al dente penne pasta and succulent portobello mushrooms. Karen, our waitress, was friendly and prompt and the overall atmosphere was wonderful.

After dinner we jumped in a cab and were home by 10:30 pm. What a wonderful way to break up the week and enjoy an after-work wine, music and dinner date in one of San Francisco’s best neighborhoods!

Bocce Cafe

478 Green St San Francisco, CA

(415) 981-2044

Food: Good

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Excellent

For more information, contact Melinda Maximova, matchmaker with Perfect Search

melinda@theperfectsearch.com


February 23, 2012

Date Planner: Elmwood District

Mid-Week Dinner and a Movie Date

Price: Moderate

I’d like to open this Date Plan with a nod to one of those quaint East Bay neighborhoods, perfect for a mid-week, dinner-and-movie date. The Elmwood District is in Berkeley, nestled among large, brown shingle and Colonial Revival homes on College Ave. near Ashby. It is home to one of my favorite East Bay restaurants, La Méditerranée. This moderately priced restaurant has three locations, two in San Francisco and one in Berkeley. The one in Berkeley has the stellar outdoor veranda for dining al fresco and people watching. The Fillmore location in San Francisco has the same quality food, but is itty-bitty, with the cutest collection of mosaic tables made by, none other than, moi! The tables are over 13 years old now, so definitely show wear and tear from the high volume restaurant, but add charm to the quaint San Francisco eatery.

La Méditerranée

I have always loved dining al fresco, thus, La Méditerranée in Berkeley is perfect with it’s delightful outdoor seating, and huge, ceiling-mounted heat lamps. It is a lovely venue to watch people, sip wine, and enjoy good food and conversation, and if you’re lucky you can get a table outside next to the pet store and watch the cute little animals through the window in the adjacent glass cages.

Parking is easy in the residential part of Elmwood and I suggest parking on Piedmont Ave, a couple blocks away from the restaurant. Then walk past the two-story, Arts and Crafts homes amidst mature magnolia, and oak trees, and imagine their occupants — professors from UC Berkeley perhaps? Whoever they are, they are lucky to live in such a beautiful, flower-laden neighborhood. Before requesting an outdoor table on the La Méditerranée veranda, stroll up and down the two-block commercial district along College Ave. and window shop the boutiques, book stores and gift shops.

La Méditerranée

My husband and I dined at La Méditerranée on a Wednesday night before a movie. We started out with a quality bottle of Guenoc wine for 30.00, and the combination platter of appetizers and greens, with feta and olives. The wine was simple and dry and didn’t compete for attention with the food. The platter was gorgeous in both taste and presentation. Pink pickled cauliflower, green pepperocinis, orange carrots, purple cabbage, and yellow lemon adorn the traditional dish of pita, olives, humus, tabouli, dolma, feta, and baba ghanoush. The plate was a kaleidoscope of colors and flavors and quite filling, so I recommend sharing an entrée if you are not big eaters. We shared the filet mignon kabob for our entrée and were delighted with the quality of beef. Tender chunks of filet mignon were alternately skewered between crunchy, browned onions, and served over a bed of rice.

Combination Platter

The service staff was friendly and attentive and the place filled up quickly after 6 pm. We ate early since we wanted to catch a movie after dinner at the Rialto Cinemas down the street. No time for dessert, we polished of the bottle of wine, and with a tipsy glow, headed to the movie to top off a perfect, mid-week date.

La Méditerranée

2936 College Ave, Berkeley, CA 94705

(510) 540-7773

Food: Excellent

Atmosphere: Excellent

Service: Good

For more information, contact Melinda Maximova, matchmaker with Perfect Search

melinda@theperfectsearch.com


October 21, 2010

Matchmaker ruffles feathers on the radio

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John Banks Show: Bringing Man Out of the Cave

John Banks Show: Bringing Man Out of the Cave

It sounded like a cat fight on Here Women Talk Radio, which aired Oct 11th. Melinda Maximova was the guest speaker and received a lot of direct hits on The John Banks Show: Bringing Man Out Of The Cave.Feathers were flying in the studio, and a flurry of post interview chat room tirades were generated. Melinda Maximova, matchmaker with Perfect Search, dating coach, and author of, “Power Shift: Shifting Gears to Catch Your Match”, is used to controversy. She represents how men really feel regarding dating and relationships – and sometimes it’s not what women want to hear.

Maximova began the interview with a jarring statement: “Many women who were beautiful in their teen years and early 20s are dumbfounded when they approach 40 and find they no longer have the same power over men as they had when they were 25. These women will heartlessly dismiss a guy for what they perceive as un-chivalrous behavior when he no longer jumps through hoops just to date her. The power balance shifts in the 40s to one of equality — and it is a game-changing realization for many women in this age group”.

Maximova continued to outline the premise of her book, which in essence, says that 30 and 40 year old women need to learn flexibility, and realize that men do want women who are intelligent, grounded and powerful, but men want to feel adored and appreciated by women too, in the same way they made women feel in their 20s.

The website chat room detonated after the interview. One of the panelists ranted, “Todays show was really a ball breaker for women in my opinion, and ironically our “balls” were broken by a woman. Haven’t we come too far and worked too hard to take our place as equals in every area of life to “pretend” on a date in order to secure another date? No woman should need a man that badly – regardless of his income or be advised to act in such a way.”

John Banks, the host of the show, “Bringing Man Out of the Cave”, handled the situation professionally. He later chatted, “It is truly interesting to hear what so many people got differently from yesterday’s show. My wife and many others listening got that Mrs. Maximova was saying that both parties should show mutual adoration, not a one way street from the woman. She was saying that, at our age the female should MATCH the adoration of the man if she likes him. She actually reiterated that a few times. She was saying that men and women should jump through hoops for each other equally. She was stating that men want equality in adoration, and life. Isn’t that what the women’s movement was about?”

He goes on to remind listeners, “My show is an attempt to give women a greater perspective on how men think and their thoughts, right or wrong. We all have to truly open our minds to hear and ponder the other side. Melinda has spent years interviewing and speaking to thousands of men. She has worked with noted author Dr. John Grey of “Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars”. You can find some of her interviews on You Tube. In the interviews the men tell the stories she is expressing.”

Another chatter responded:“In listening to the archives, you can hear that she (Maximova) was not trying to bash women, rather, she was encouraging women to be thoughtful, appreciative and understanding, as opposed to emotionally volatile and demanding. Although the women on the panel were “ruffled” from the conversation, many listeners chimed in to say they appreciated her contribution to helping women understand men, in spite of the fact that they may not actually want to hear what she had to say.”

All through out the interview, Maximova hammered home the Power Shift premise and how it affects women in their 30s and 40s. She told listeners that men approaching their late 30s are realizing their own power for the first time. They become more financially stable, more ruggedly handsome, and are walking with the confidence and wisdom resulting from age. And because of this shift, when a 40-year-old woman acts out in fits of entitlement, she may find that he has a line of other, perhaps even younger, women readily waiting to fill her shoes. As 40-something men are finding themselves with options for the first time they will easily dismiss a woman unless she realizes that she is no longer the only prize. He is now a prize too— and although this is hard to hear, 40-year-old women better start jumping through a few hoops of their own if they want to catch a really great guy and keep him.

The interview touched some very sensitive nerves in both the studio, and the chat room. A female listener wrote in, “Melinda, Melinda , Melinda…darlin’ what are you smoking?”. Another listener defended Maximova “Gail….what are YOU smoking? Did you hear her at all on Monday? She’s been saying ALL along that it is supposed to be a “mutual” thing.”

Unruffled herself, Maximova continued with her viewpoint. – “Women can’t get away with simply blaming men for being jerks. Why are you choosing these men?”  She outlined the The Good Man Checklist, from her book ,and encouraged women to adapt to the patterns of PLEASURE: “A truly good man is a good provider, loyal, empathetic, aspiring, selfless, useful, rational and endearing.  Before you lose your heart to the wrong guy, make sure he is worth it.”

Many of the “ruffled” panelists on the show, were themselves, single and dating in their 40s, and they had a hard time swallowing the medicine Maximova was dishing out. Maximova hit a raw spot and the emotions were heated.

One chatter found the tumultuous interview upsetting, “Let me start off by saying, I love this show. However, I was disappointed about several aspects of the show this week. I did not agree with everything that Melinda said, but a lot of it I got, and could see her points. I never got that she said women should bow down, or do what men want. I heard her say over and over again, that when you are attracting a mate you should be honest and straight forward vs. holding back or acting uninterested. If you like someone, show them, and in return they will show you how they feel about you. Treat others how you wish to be treated.”

Speaking with aplomb, Maximova told her female listeners that they actually gain power by losing their sense of entitlement.  She tells them to step off of their pedestals, and out of their gilded carriages, in order to find and keep a really good man. She says that women in their 30s and 40s need to be proactive and smart, and change their relationship strategies to create a balance of power, so they can learn the methods of courtship that men had to painfully, learn in their youth.

About a third into the interview, a female listener called in and abruptly called Maximova a misogynist. The caller later went on the chat room after the show and exploded: “I’m smoking the reality pipe! Sorry, I just don’t hear her message the way you do…but that’s ok. Her word choice, if you think she and I are on the same page is archaic: “pedestal, adored”.. spare me. And the whole rap about men in their 20s being tired of putting women on pedestals is a crock to me…”

One chatter piped in, “ I guess in general I felt like the point that was being made by Melinda was missed and the show started to take a form of negativity that was straight up unpleasant.” Someone else chatted, “She ruffled feathers, no love fest yesterday that’s for sure, and so it goes.”

A single, 40-something woman, called in while the show was airing.  She later typed, “Please, please, send those pedestal men my way. This doesn’t imply I’ve had bad experiences with men/husbands but ….a pedestal? I’ve always treated men as equals and they’ve returned the favor. What’s up with you and this talk of men in their 20s being exhausted from hoisting girls on pedestals? I think it should be a mutual admiration society don’t you? And this would be the advice I would impart to your audience. . .”

In her book, Power Shift: Shifting Gears to Catch Your Match, Maximova says the responsibility for chivalrous behavior falls squarely on the shoulders of the man during the first few dates, but once the relationship develops, it should even out, and the woman must reciprocate all the sweet things he did for her at the beginning.  She encourages women to maintain a confident, optimistic, positive attitude, and be forgiving of dating foibles and fopauxs.

To listen to the interview click here: JOHN BANKS, BRINGING MAN OUT OF THE CAVE, OCT 11, 2010 Guest: Melinda Maximova, Matchmaker and author of “Power Shift: Shifting Gears to Catch Your Match”

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Melinda Maximova is the founder of Perfect Search, an international, VIP matchmaking service. She has played Cupid for hundreds of successful marriages and conducted thousands of intimate interviews with men and women on the topics of what they want, what they don’t want and what they have done in the past. With an advanced degree in sociology and human sexuality, she has been called upon as a premier expert in her field on countless radio and TV talk shows.

While conducting searches for her clients’ perfect match, Maximova was both puzzled and disheartened by the number of talented, successful and attractive, women who were desperately trying to find and keep Mr. Right. These women were beautiful, smart and grounded—yet, they couldn’t keep a really great guy. Maximova realized that an important social dynamic was plaguing women in their 30s and 40s compromising their dating success. She calls this social dynamic the Power Shift phenomenon, a shift in power between the sexes that begins in the mid-30s. This shift in power takes women by surprise because they expect romance to proceed the way it did in their 20s and early 30s.

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Power Shift: Shifting Gears to Catch Your Match, addresses topics such as, why men like dating younger women and why men want hot. Power Shift defines the Princess Syndrome, the difference between self-esteem and self-importance, and discusses sex, fidelity and trust. It guides readers through the Good Man Checklist, the PLEASURE Principal, the patterns of MISHAP, and the Seven “F”s For Keeping Your Man. The book illustrates the complicated topics of conflict resolution, marriage ultimatums, and prenuptial agreements, and offers specific tools to help women think like a winner, thereby attracting men who are also winners. Power Shift will help readers navigate and negotiate dating to find their perfect match, and help them determine if they are ready for Mr. Right when they find him. Through humor and matchmaker case studies, Power Shift: Shifting Gears to Catch Your Match, provides a road map for overcoming the pitfalls of the Power Shift phenomenon to empower women in their 30s and 40s to find intimate love with the powerful man in their life.
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Read more about the: Power Shift: Shifting Gears to Catch Your Match.
Through case studies as an exclusive matchmaker with Perfect Search, Melinda Maximova identifies a phenomenon that is undermining the success of many relationships. She calls this dynamic, Power Shift.Through the eyes of a matchmaker she helps women avoid several dating pitfalls and relationship syndromes and address questions of controversial topics about the sexes.

Whether you are:

* Dating a divorced man
* Already married
* Single and searching for Mr. Right
* An urban cougar
* Single mom

You will most likely be navigating the Power Shift.

A dating authority and coach, Melinda Maximova knows what it takes for intelligent, grounded and impressive women to find and keep the man who will love and respect them the way they deserve. She helps women determine who is worth fighting for and how to keep him. She has helped thousands of successful men navigate the dating scene. Now, she will help millions of women negotiate the obstacles they are encountering in their love lives to in order to find the man of their dreams. She will address topics of:

* What Makes A Man Run For The Hills
* What Men Want
* Is He Worth It?
* Are You Ready For Mr. Right?
* Dating And The Power Shift
* Navigating The Power Shift For The Long Haul

Power Shift: Shifting Gears to Catch Your Match

For more information, contact Melinda Maximova, matchmaker with Perfect Search

info@theperfectsearch.com

melinda@theperfectsearch.com


About Perfect Search, Inc.

Perfect Search takes a unique approach to matchmaking.  For an annual retainer personal agents create a narrow, highly focused search for the client’s perfect match. The client relaxes while a Perfect Search agent does all the work to find and screen possible candidates to present for consideration. Qualified single women are encouraged to join the prestigious candidate pool.
Counseling Advice

I will answer any relationship, sexual or dating question.


October 5, 2010

Dating video

Filed under: Uncategorized — admin @ 12:13 pm

A person will sum you up in the first three seconds of meeting you and will make sweeping judgments about you based entirely upon your looks. Look sensational on a first date. Wear something that is modern, well-fitting and shows your assets in the best light. Hygiene should be impeccable, and you should hold yourself with a calm, erect and confident air conveying an optimistic, positive attitude. Remember, a first date should not be work. It should be fun. The conversation should flow in an easy and equal pace of mutual self-disclosure about light, fun topics that make you both smile. Men should be chivalrous, and women should be forgiving of any missteps or misspoke words. Don’t have sex too soon and never burn bridges. In the worst-case scenario, after the date you’ve made a friend; best case, you have met the love of your life and there will be many more future dates on the horizon.


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